If there’s one thing you should know about me

it’s that if anything good comes, I’m afraid it will leave in an instant.

I hope that helps explain things.

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Back in 2007, I took part in Project Stitch, a project organized by local youth in preparation for World AIDS Day on December 1st. There were different activities divided amongst us and since I was into creative writing, I joined the Slam Poetry folks (which really consisted of me and two other girls). During my time there, I wrote this poem to express how I felt about people.

My bones remain broken,
My bruises visible.
The damage of deception, betrayal, and blistering words have cut
these canyons in my heart.
So I feebly kneel before the pieces, attempting to begin building these shards
But
Here comes an invited guest,
Loading up on trust,
Before walking away.
Followed by a mother,
And a lover,
Several others,
All taking a bite of what I’ve too freely handed out.
It’s not long till I’m left with my heart,
Stale as a rubber tire.

Without question, I leave my heart in the cold,
Until it is coated with frost and suspicion.

Without doubt, I construct and fortify layers of walls,
Of stone and insecurity.

Without hesitation, I put up frigid, heavy chains,
Melded from iron and isolation.

Every ending has its lessons:

My bones still remain broken,
But my bruises lay unseen,
Beneath this vast, desolate, empty entity
That I used to call “me”.